February 2018: Adam, my husband at the time, came to me and said, “I have a question I’ve wanted to ask you for about 10 years.” “What?” I asked. “Are you bisexual? I think you should give it some thought, it might help you understand your past and answer some questions.” Two months and one incredible therapist later, I accepted My Truth…. I’m gay!
What was going to happen to Adam and I? What would my kids or anyone else think? How can I be married and want to be with a woman? I was discovering a lot about my feelings for girls that had been bottled up all my life because growing up I was taught it was wrong.
I was mean to girls, only had guy friends and always had a boyfriend. I knew that once I said, “I’m gay” out loud I couldn’t take it back and I was terrified. When I did, Adam held me tight and said, “I know you are and I still love you. We will figure this out. Im right here and I’ve never been more proud of you.”
October 2018: Adam and I decided to get a divorce so I could freely discover this other part of me, but I wasn’t ready to tell the kids.
April 2019: Adam and I sit the kids down and have a family pow wow about our biggest fears.
I state, “My greatest fear is that I won’t be loved for who I truly am. I’ve been doing a lot of personal growth and I am bisexual.”
Quickly Jaysa, my oldest daughter, wraps her arms around me and says, “I love you just as you are.” Then she later tells me that she’s known for about a year, but knew that when I was ready to talk about it I would.
Karra said, “Oh that makes so much sense.” Crosky, my youngest, didn’t know what was going on, but now makes jokes!
September 14, 2019: I made a post sharing my truth. Adam reassured me that those who loved me still would. He was right again. Can you stop for one-second and imagine what this has been like for him? He’s my best friend and an incredible person.
TODAY: Being resilient takes bravery! My name is Ashlee Phelps! I’m gay!
